Contemplative Prayer

These past few weeks I have been considering (and practicing) an ancient form of prayer aptly titled by most modern day spiritualists as "contemplative prayer."  Throughout the month of July, our church has been focusing on contemplative prayer and as a result it has really dominated my heart and mind.

I think it is pretty obvious to most people that our society maintains a very fast pace existence (it causes the Christian to wonder if Jesus would allow himself to be caught up in our fast pace world or if he would simply refuse to live at such a torrid speed).  The "information" age we live in demands that work gets done quickly and answers need to be presented in seconds.  Last night Grant (my son) wanted me to, "hurry up and go look that up online daddy."  Furthermore, the modern (or post-modern...how ever you want to define it) person lives engulfed by noise -- TV noise, cyber noise, cell phone noise...actual noise. There is so much noise that when he/she experiences a moment of silence it feels awkward and uncomfortable.

In stark contrast, contemplative prayer seeks silence and understands that there is something very sacred to the stillness.

Even the most casual student of the Bible quickly recognizes the frequent command to "be still" and "listen" peppered throughout both testaments.  At the transfiguration God tells noisy Peter to, "listen to his son."  On Mt. Horab Elijah hears God only in the stillness.   Contemplative prayer is an attempt to stay true to the call of God on our lives to stop our noise and our talking in favor of simply "being" with God.

Our family really enjoys spending time together outside.  Perhaps it is the "Celtic Christian in us"....but we have the best time being with each other in nature.  When our family spends time "outside" we all sense a deep connection with the world and with its creator (except when Waco has gone 45 days of over 100 degree heat).  Mary and I really try to take time to listen to God in nature.

The other day Grant and I were playing baseball outside.  I was trying to teach him how to hold the bat, how to stand and when to swing (granted, I don't really know how to do any of those things, but I figured I could wing it with a four year old).  I found myself getting frustrated because Grant wouldn't listen to me.  I slowly realized that he didn't want me to teach him anything, he just wanted to be with his Daddy.  He didn't want to waste time learning baseball skills, he wanted to spend time hitting a ball with his dad.

That night I thought about how our relationship with God is like Grant and I playing baseball.  We spend so much time talking to God, telling him what we want...even instructing him on what we think should happen.  Then, we get mad when we think he isn't listening to us.  All the while God just wants to be with us...he wants to spend time with us.  Too often we insist on aggressively being the sole activist and participant in the conversation.  The great novelist, Alexander Huxley wrote, "Uncontrolled, the hunger and thirst after God may become an obstacle, cutting off the soul from what it desires.  If a person would travel far along the mystic road, he/she must learn to desire God intensely but in stillness, passively, and yet with all his/her heart, mind and strength. "

I am more and more convinced that open minded believers who desire to follow Christ down a journey of love, grace and inclusion must become passively still in the presence of the divine God.  This allows us to center ourselves on our life path in and through Christ Jesus our Lord.  I have noticed that when I  "do all the talking" in my prayers, I am not contemplating the heart of God (love), nor am I listening to God speaking to me through creation, other people and above all the "Word that became flesh and dwelt among us".  Wayne Huxley said, "You will become what you think about all day long and those days eventually become your lifetime." 

Well, Grant has just walked into our room decked out in his medieval knight costume.  He has a sword in one hand, a football in another and a wide grin on his face.  He wants us to go outside and play football with him.  This time, I am not going to say a word about throwing mechanics...Today, I don't care if he grows up to be the next Troy Aikman, I just care about spending time with him.  I bet, if I am still and aware enough, God will show up while we are throwing the ball around.  I don't plan on saying a word...I think I will just let Grant's giggle and Lucy's babbling fill the air...I think I will just let God watch us while we all spend time together.  I will let you know how it goes.

Sometimes Life Just Isn't All That Good

I love this picture.  It was taken at the end of what our family calls “cousin camp.”  It is a time during the summer where all the cousins gather together at “the ranch” and Mary/Amy plan all sorts of fun events for the group.  The kids always have a great time, and this year was no exception – they painted, took a “magical safari” with their uncle/dad Brad, went to the Baylor pool, had a water balloon fight and ate homemade ice cream.  BUT...this picture was taken at the end of cousin camp.  You know what the “end” of anything good feels like – it is a mixture of sheer exhaustion, frayed nerves, and sadness that the fun is over.  Well, as so obviously illustrated in the photo, the kids were feeling every bit of tiredness and sadness that you could possibly feel. (I hope it doesn't say something about our kids that in the picture both of them look significantly more frustrated than the other three....)

One of most endearing traits of children is their unabashed willingness to wear their emotion on their sleeve - they simply aren’t afraid to tell you how they feel, for better or worse.  Sometimes, oftentimes, I wish Christians were more like that…I wish we were honest with other believers and even non-believers about how we really feel.  I wish we showed the world our brokenness and let them in on our struggles.  Celtic author Philip Newell said, “When we let the world inside our hearts and show them our struggles they will be even more amazed at the grace and love that flows much deeper and that is able to redeem us.” 

Instead, modern day evangelical conservative Christians have chosen to huddle up in their mega-churches with their smiling faces and angrily shout to the world that they need to come back to God and join the ranks of supposed eternally 'happy' believers.  And, they are shocked when “one of their own” leaders (too many to count?) is struck down by a moral failure? 

I submit that we try something different…let's try being authentic with each other and the world.  Let’s “become like little children” and be honest about how life can sometimes be down right unfair, and hard….and sometimes it just doesn’t go how we had planned it.  Let’s look straight into the camera of the world and unashamedly own whatever experience of life we are in and all of the emotions and feelings it causes.  Perhaps then, the world will see us for who we really are, sinners in desperate need of a loving God whose grace is more powerful than our brokenness and whose mercy transcends our hurt. Sometimes life is rough, sometimes it beats us up and we get tired and frustrated and sad...but that's okay.  We can show those emotions knowing that they aren't the end of the story, rather they point to a beautiful narrative that runs through the center of our hearts -- the love of God through Christ Jesus our Lord.